From The Page (June, 1982):
JUNE 26, BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND! The
First Annual Westermark Champions
10:00 am to 6 pm Woodside ELementary School, Woodside Road, Woodside Calif.
REVEL TO FOLLOW TOURNEY. Maps to revel will be available at the Tourney site. Come and celebrate the Summer Equinox on June 26!
Baronial Confirmation at 12:00 noon, Lists at 1:00pm.
Frolic in the sunshine dabble in the arts and rejoice with Westermarks as The Barony celebrates summer in true Westermark fashion with the following competitions.
Westermark Champions Tourney: Cooking Competition Coffee Anything to be judged by the Baroness's own sweet tooth, a jolly Bitching Contest, Ye Olde Numenorian Brick Throwing Contest (if you don't know what it is, come and find out). A special contest for Children to be sponsored by the Baronet, Heraldic Toys for children age nine and under also the first annual Duck Tape roll for children and last but not least the Tacky Favor contest and Weird Weapons list.
THE GRINDL LACK TOOTH COOKING COMPETITION. At last! The competition that all, master and mistresses of the culinary arts have been waitinggot! That chef supreme of Haute Cusine, the creator of such immortal gastronominic masterpieces as "Toad Puree" "Magot and Raven Salad" "Grub Tarts" and "Clay Muffins". Grindl Lack Tooth will sponsor a cooking competition at the Westermark Champions Tourney. Grindl will be there to do the Judging. First Prize will be a Medieval Cusine Art and big gaudy medal.
The rules are as follows:
1. Entries must be both a fully prepared dish and a recipe.
2. Entrants must use only indregents that were available to Old World cooks in the Middle Ages. We do not want a repetition of the nastiness that occurred with the disqualification of Lady Fluff's Kangroo Gonad Surprise last year.
3. Appearance will count as much as basicinedibility.Thetruly outstanding dish will discourage potential diners ever if they absolutely have no idea what it is.
4. The use of outright poison is not allowed.
5. Any dish whose aroma is thorough enough to knock one over at twenty pace will be disqualified for as Grindl says "We're making dishes dearies not weapons".
THE SHAKESPEARE COMPETITIONS. For all mushyheaded romantics who love The Swan of Avon and harbur inner desire to spout forth Shakespeare this is for you. The Shakespeare Competitions will be for all who would like to try their hand at reciting, or memeorizing a scene from a Shakespeare play or sonnett.
1. The material presented must be from Shakespeare, the plays or sonnets.
2. The Skakespeare material may be either memorized or may be read.
3. Material should be no longer than three to four minutes.
4. Individual performance only (if there is a good response will develope in future for scenes between two individuals).
5. A copy of the material you wish to perform or read at the Westermark Tourney should be either brought to the Tourney so the judges can follow the presentation or mailed to the autocrat for this competition Lady Catherine of Umbria (contact info omitted).
FIRST PRIZE will be a special edition of ABOVE LONDON a book of outstanding photos of London with text by Alastair Cook, second and third prizes will also be offered.
[I tried to emulate this as close as possible, including odd spelling and lack of punctuation, just to give the full flavor ... as it were. Looking at other event copy in this issue, I am not really sure if this is a case of the Chronicler not liking to spell check their work and/or disliking punctuation, or what, as other event copy has similar spacing, spelling and punctuation issues. At first I thought some of this was simply because it was copy from The Westermark, but p'raps not. Hirsch]
Description of this event (if any) taken from The Page.
The West Kingdom History Website was created by and is maintained by Hirsch von Henford (mka Ken Mayer).