The Bards of Bedlam Filk Library

Glory for Nothing

Lyrics by Kevin Perigrynne

(To the Tune of: Money for Nothing, by Dire Straights)

slowly in falsetto
I want some, I want some more gloreeee
I want some, I want some more gloreeee
I want some, I want some more gloreeee
I want some, I want some more gloreeee

Look at them stick-jocks, that's the way you do it
You swing a stick and join the chivalry
That ain't peerage, that's the way you do it
Get your glory for nothin' and your chicks for free
Yeah! That ain't peerage, that's the way you do it
Let me tell you, those guys are dumb,
Maybe get concussion on their low-brow thick-heads
Maybe get a bruise upon their bum…

CHORUS
Gotta wear these heavy-weight Tudors… custom ordered calligraphy
We gotta do these illuminations, gotta do these royal decrees.

That ugly sucker in the chain-mail and the white belt
Hey buddy, it's him they cheer
That ugly sucker got his own damn' harem
That ugly sucker he's a Royal Peer.

CHORUS
Gotta wear these heavy-weight Tudors, custom ordered calligraphy
We gotta do these illuminations, gotta do these royal decrees
     Do em', do em'
Gotta wear these heavy-weight Tudors, custom ordered calligraphy
We gotta do these illuminations, gotta do these royal decrees

I shoulda learned to swing a broad-sword,
I shoulda learned to tote a shield.
Look at that mamma, clingin' to that tin-suit
Man, I wish that I could make her yield…
What's them, metallic noises?
Bangin' on each other like a tympani
That ain't peerage, that's the way you do it
Get your glory for nothin' and your chicks for free.

CHORUS
Gotta wear these heavy-weight Tudors, custom ordered calligraphy
We gotta do these illuminations, gotta do these royal decrees
     (howling dog tone) Owwwww, ow ow

That ain't peerage, that's the way you do it
Swing a stick and join the chivalry
That ain't peerage, that's the way you do it
Get your glory for nothin' and your chicks for free

Counterpoint for two or more voices:
I want some, I want some, I want some more glory
     That ain't peerage, that's the way you do it
I want some, I want some, I want some more glory
     You swing a stick and join the chivalry
I want some, I want some, I want some more glory
     Yeah, that ain't peerage, that's the way you do it
I want some, I want some, I want some more glory
     Get your glory for nothin' and your chicks for free

Note from the bard: The SCA filk (above) appeared almost full-blown in my (admittedly wierd) mind about 3 am a few days ago (written May 10, 1993). (I hope Mark Knopfler will forgive me.) It IS satire. (But we all know the attitude exists)… Written in the middle of the night while the kids slept and Patrice was working the closing shift at her store.

The West Kingdom History Website was created by and is maintained by Hirsch von Henford (mka Ken Mayer).