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Bardic Arts

Phillip Harlech vs. The Pyrates
Margrethe Astrid Ravn
September 10, AS XXXIII (1998)

Phillip Harlech, Exeter
<who serves his humor sinister>
went to the Pirates, all in jest
to sit atop their Corbies' Nest
But ere he could, the Captain's mate
stopped Sir Phillip at their gate
and said, "No knightly spurs or chain
can ever sit atop our main.
For though you were a privateer
our Pirates' ship has cost us dear.
The weight of one with such a crown
would surely make our mast fall down.
Your life would end upon our decks
and then the King would have our necks!
For we were chastised once before
and I will taste his wrath no more!"
At this answer, Phillip cried
"The king? Why we fought side by side
'gainst fierce invaders from An Tir.
You think a fall like that I'd fear?
I'd sooner fear a new-made knight!
Besides, this rigging looks all right,
and many a mast I've climbed before,
so why may I not have one more?"
But Pirates firmly stood their ground,
and Phillip soon was elsewhere found
a-swapping tales of daring-do.
So spread the word of Pirates who
speak loud of action, word and deed
and swear to make all foemen bleed;
who claim to heed no earthly powers
and fire cannons at all hours ....
But worry not in evenings late
for yours or for your children's fate
for when a crown they face at last
we find their courage stands half-mast.

This piece was written for the Mists Bardic Competition, and was the entry for 'Original Piece in Period Style'.

"Iambic tetrameter in rhymed couplets.

"I heard this story at the Debarchery event in Cloondara. I even remember at the time thinking "There's a song in that...." It ended up a poem, but it still applies. While Phil was not at the competition, I managed to perform it to him at a later date; and I was quite pleased at his reaction, which was utter amusement." -- Margrethe Astrid Ravn

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