The History of the Kingdom of The West
Bardic Arts

My Awards Go Jingle, Jangle, Jingle
by
Gerhardt von Nordflammen

(Tune: My Spurs Go Jingle, Jangle, Jingle)

Chorus:
My awards go jingle, jangle, jingle.
As I go strutting pompously along.
Oh I see you’ve only got a single,
If you think that I’ll talk to you, you’re wrong!

Oh I’m a peer,
Yes I’m a peer.
If you don’t outrank me don’t come near.
But if you do,
Yes if you do,
And you give me something, I love you.

CHORUS

Oh there’s the Queen.
Yes there’s the Queen.
I’ll run up to her ass and lick it clean.
And there’s the King.
Yes there’s the King.
Let me put my lips around his thing.

CHORUS

And there’s the Dukes.
Yes there’s the Dukes.
I’ll go fawn upon them ‘till they puke.
And there’s the Earls.
Yes there’s the Earls.
But we mighty peers don’t talk to churls.

CHORUS

I’ve got a leaf.
A laurel too.
If you don’t have one, then fuck you.
I’ve got the QOG,
And pelican.
And I’ll be an Arts King when I can.

CHORUS

Oh I don’t fight.
Or come to blows.
But if I did I would be the best God knows.
I’ll take a shield.
I’ll take a sword.
When just touching them will get awards.

CHORUS

At the grand march,
Now don’t forget.
Announce my name and then half the alphabet.
My greatest joy:
Titles and name,
Take heralds half an hour to declaim.

CHORUS

Awards aren’t cheap.
Buzz off you creep.
There’s no more room at the top of the heap.
Now I’ve got mine,
‘Tis my design.
To make all you bozos stand in line.

CHORUS


This is from the second folio of Gerhardt von Nordflammen. © 1984, Lawrence Hyink III


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